Don't tell Hank, but I think I enjoy reading your posts the most. "Entropy accelerator"? When I read that I actually stopped and shared the phrase with some close friends. It's hilarious and accurate at the same time for describing folks we all know and love. Your posts help me find/remind me of the humor imbedded in our daily struggle to survive and enjoy the day. And yes that includes marriage to someone that is very different in their habits and personality.
As an example, I enjoy very sharp high quality kitchen knives. After using one I always clean it, dry it, and return it to the knife block. My wife? She'll use it, lay it down, wash it with a scrub brush then lay it in the drain rack (to my utter horror). I'll retrieve the knife and silently demonstrate how to return it to its rightful place. Well, demonstrations haven't changed her in 36 years of marriage... The only success I have is with my large chef's knives - because she doesn't like to use them. So they stay sharp.
I think I'll just love her and accept her - I'm sure not going to change her. I'll remind myself there is humanity and humor there as well.
If you're waiting for a relationship in which no compromise is required, you'll be waiting a loooong time. Acceptance and workarounds are key if you don't want to be alone!
The ways that divisions of labor shake out in a relationship - and what things you take for granted or forget how to do as a result - are always so interesting to me. Dex loves to eat, but he also is the kind of cook who meticulously follows and perfects a recipe, and left to his own devices he would happily eat the same three or four meals almost every day (although he has a strangely wizardly sense for flavor combinations). I love to cook for other people and I do all the cooking in our house (Dex does the dishes!) -- but when I'm on my own I find that I like to eat about seven snack-like meals over the course of the day and I don't cook anything fancier than garlic toast. Being alone has its hardships, but it can also stir up such fascinating forgotten joys and ways of doing things.
Mar 15, 2023·edited Mar 15, 2023Liked by Holly Heyser
Entropy accelerator… I really like that. That’s definitely me, as evidenced by my clothes, tools, vehicles…
It’s also funny you wrote this, as I’ve also left behind my partner to go to the Rendezvous and she’s going to be cooking for the first time in years to feed herself while I’m gone. I usually cook a bunch of meals for her before leaving, but this time she wanted to do her own thing… so I did the grocery shopping and left instructions. I think it’s good to hone those skills a bit so she doesn’t lose them altogether!
I think the biggest adjustment for me was time: If you wait until you're hungry to start dinner, you've lost the battle. Probably the single largest reason I'd end up eating takeout, because I hate eating late.
Funny thing about time is that cooking dinner is pretty similar to photographing dinner: The shoot/eating goes fast, but the prep and cleanup take some time.
Hey, at least you didn't throw the rotisserie chicken bones into the corner of the room and let them stack up. ;) I cleaned a friend's father-in-law's house one time where that was old man's MO. That and the nasty habit of letting live ammunition rounds of different varieties roll around on the floor.
Hunting season sees a lot more cooking time for me, mainly because I am trying to prepare large meals for friends and neighborhood (if I am lucky). I know what you mean about falling into complacency, particularly if you have access to a beast of burden.
Sounds like you got back to success, which is founded on repeated failures. And had a wonderful and satisfying time doing it.
Your write up makes me wistful and sad at what I have done to myself with my workload. I need to shed a chunk of work consistently so I can add more gardening, hunting and maybe even a little Monterey Bay fishing to my days. I end up eating at the local taqueria a lot when cooking at home seems like a chore. And it seems like a chore quite frequently with long days at work. What I need is less dependency and more new failures in kitchen!
Yes. This. I love my time in the kitchen! Glad you are flexing your kitchen muscles. And enjoying your new stove! For me, it's as much about the thinking, planning, shopping, thawing, prepping, tools, time, creating, artistry, aromas, flavors, plating, etc., as it is about the actual eating. Eating and nourishing my senses and my self are happy bonuses!
Ok first I had to look up the meaning of entropy accelerator. But my orderly mind led me to first look up entropy. I had a reasonable idea of the meaning of accelerator. There were 3 meanings of “entropy”, the first and the last were simply babble and I’m quite certain do not apply to Hank. Ah, but the second meaning, well let’s just say I resemble that remark. You guys keep keeping on. You’re much appreciated.
I smiled so throughout this post. This is so my wife and I. We had always shared the kitchen duties over the years. Then, about 10 years ago, as I was easing into a consulting job, I began expanding my cooking chops into wild game dishes, mainly because I ran into some guy named Shaw online.
Now, I probably do 95% of the cooking in our house in, what has become, my kitchen. Even when I traveled for work or now, for outdoor excursions, I leave several meals prepped for her in the fridge. I’ll return days later, only to find everything still remaining right where I had left them on the fridge shelves. I’m not sure what she eats when I’m gone; probably popcorn and boxed cereal but, somehow, she survives just fine. Adapt and adjust, I suppose.
Of course, when I walk back into the house after a trip, I’ll hear,”So, what are you making for dinner tonight?” 🤨
Hahaha! I DO eat the leftovers. But yeah, learned dependence is a real thing!
No cereal in the house. I try to not have anything here that gives me self-control issues: cereal, bread, Twizzlers, malted milk balls, See's candy. Because, yeah, I could live on all that...
Don't tell Hank, but I think I enjoy reading your posts the most. "Entropy accelerator"? When I read that I actually stopped and shared the phrase with some close friends. It's hilarious and accurate at the same time for describing folks we all know and love. Your posts help me find/remind me of the humor imbedded in our daily struggle to survive and enjoy the day. And yes that includes marriage to someone that is very different in their habits and personality.
As an example, I enjoy very sharp high quality kitchen knives. After using one I always clean it, dry it, and return it to the knife block. My wife? She'll use it, lay it down, wash it with a scrub brush then lay it in the drain rack (to my utter horror). I'll retrieve the knife and silently demonstrate how to return it to its rightful place. Well, demonstrations haven't changed her in 36 years of marriage... The only success I have is with my large chef's knives - because she doesn't like to use them. So they stay sharp.
I think I'll just love her and accept her - I'm sure not going to change her. I'll remind myself there is humanity and humor there as well.
If you're waiting for a relationship in which no compromise is required, you'll be waiting a loooong time. Acceptance and workarounds are key if you don't want to be alone!
The ways that divisions of labor shake out in a relationship - and what things you take for granted or forget how to do as a result - are always so interesting to me. Dex loves to eat, but he also is the kind of cook who meticulously follows and perfects a recipe, and left to his own devices he would happily eat the same three or four meals almost every day (although he has a strangely wizardly sense for flavor combinations). I love to cook for other people and I do all the cooking in our house (Dex does the dishes!) -- but when I'm on my own I find that I like to eat about seven snack-like meals over the course of the day and I don't cook anything fancier than garlic toast. Being alone has its hardships, but it can also stir up such fascinating forgotten joys and ways of doing things.
I have high tolerance for repetition! But I'm also in perfect-then-move-on mode these days :-)
Entropy accelerator… I really like that. That’s definitely me, as evidenced by my clothes, tools, vehicles…
It’s also funny you wrote this, as I’ve also left behind my partner to go to the Rendezvous and she’s going to be cooking for the first time in years to feed herself while I’m gone. I usually cook a bunch of meals for her before leaving, but this time she wanted to do her own thing… so I did the grocery shopping and left instructions. I think it’s good to hone those skills a bit so she doesn’t lose them altogether!
I think the biggest adjustment for me was time: If you wait until you're hungry to start dinner, you've lost the battle. Probably the single largest reason I'd end up eating takeout, because I hate eating late.
Funny thing about time is that cooking dinner is pretty similar to photographing dinner: The shoot/eating goes fast, but the prep and cleanup take some time.
Hey, at least you didn't throw the rotisserie chicken bones into the corner of the room and let them stack up. ;) I cleaned a friend's father-in-law's house one time where that was old man's MO. That and the nasty habit of letting live ammunition rounds of different varieties roll around on the floor.
Hunting season sees a lot more cooking time for me, mainly because I am trying to prepare large meals for friends and neighborhood (if I am lucky). I know what you mean about falling into complacency, particularly if you have access to a beast of burden.
Sounds like you got back to success, which is founded on repeated failures. And had a wonderful and satisfying time doing it.
Your write up makes me wistful and sad at what I have done to myself with my workload. I need to shed a chunk of work consistently so I can add more gardening, hunting and maybe even a little Monterey Bay fishing to my days. I end up eating at the local taqueria a lot when cooking at home seems like a chore. And it seems like a chore quite frequently with long days at work. What I need is less dependency and more new failures in kitchen!
That is a very real problem. Can't cook if you don't have time.
I've been on a cooking bender and I'm sure it will crash when a busy time comes along, and I'll be off to a restaurant or four.
I hope you find a way to get your workload under control!
Yes. This. I love my time in the kitchen! Glad you are flexing your kitchen muscles. And enjoying your new stove! For me, it's as much about the thinking, planning, shopping, thawing, prepping, tools, time, creating, artistry, aromas, flavors, plating, etc., as it is about the actual eating. Eating and nourishing my senses and my self are happy bonuses!
Ok first I had to look up the meaning of entropy accelerator. But my orderly mind led me to first look up entropy. I had a reasonable idea of the meaning of accelerator. There were 3 meanings of “entropy”, the first and the last were simply babble and I’m quite certain do not apply to Hank. Ah, but the second meaning, well let’s just say I resemble that remark. You guys keep keeping on. You’re much appreciated.
Combining the words is my little thing 😀
I smiled so throughout this post. This is so my wife and I. We had always shared the kitchen duties over the years. Then, about 10 years ago, as I was easing into a consulting job, I began expanding my cooking chops into wild game dishes, mainly because I ran into some guy named Shaw online.
Now, I probably do 95% of the cooking in our house in, what has become, my kitchen. Even when I traveled for work or now, for outdoor excursions, I leave several meals prepped for her in the fridge. I’ll return days later, only to find everything still remaining right where I had left them on the fridge shelves. I’m not sure what she eats when I’m gone; probably popcorn and boxed cereal but, somehow, she survives just fine. Adapt and adjust, I suppose.
Of course, when I walk back into the house after a trip, I’ll hear,”So, what are you making for dinner tonight?” 🤨
Leftovers.
Hahaha! I DO eat the leftovers. But yeah, learned dependence is a real thing!
No cereal in the house. I try to not have anything here that gives me self-control issues: cereal, bread, Twizzlers, malted milk balls, See's candy. Because, yeah, I could live on all that...